News about cases of predation on children or teenagers is widespread nowadays. Not only does assault and sexual abuse cause fear and panic amongst the parents, but it is also nothing compared to what an innocent child goes through. Such is the frequency and seriousness of this issue. Therefore, it becomes vital for parents to groom their children and warn them against predators. The first step that you need to take as parents are to know what grooming means. Secondly, you need to know how a predator grooms a child. Finally, you also have to teach your child the danger signs to recognize a predator. When you do these steps, you will be a bit more assured that your child is safer and that they won’t come to any harm.
Contents
Knowing Whom Predators Target And How They Approach Their Victims
According to various data sources, most predators are those who might know the child or your family. That is why you should keep an eye out for any family member or relative who might get too uncomfortably close to your child. Predators generally tend to target children who have some vulnerabilities, feel unloved, are not widespread, or have many friends. They mainly target children who aren’t underconfident, suffer from low self-esteem, are not supervised properly, or may have family problems.
Predators have specific characteristic ways in which they approach a child. For example, if a child is underconfident and has low self-esteem, they complement the child and their activities. They show interest in the child and learn about the child’s likes, dislikes, and the various habits the child may have. If a child feels unloved, a predator would present themselves in a good light and pretend that they have everyday experiences, interests, and backgrounds. These are the ways that any predator may target and approach an unsuspecting child.
Why Does The Predator Groom The Child?
You must understand that the predator’s goal is to gain access into their victim’s mind and manipulate them in such a way that they won’t suspect their actions. Therefore, the predator will be aiming to make the child, that is, their victim, as close and comfortable to them as possible. That way, the child would trust the perpetrator enough to be alone with them and thus, not suspect what activity the predator intends to engage in.
How Does The Predator Groom His Victim?
There are several steps in which a predator grooms its victim.
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- Breaking Down The Child’s Defenses And Gaining Their Trust: A predator tries to break down a child’s defenses and isolate their affections towards themselves. They give the child things to win over the friendship. They may also try to give the child privileges to activities or items that are typically out-of-bounds for the child. Most importantly, the fatter the child carefully and make them feel special. They pretend to be a sympathetic friend who understands how the child feels.
- Being On Good Terms With The Victim’s Family: Predators generally try to target single-parent families. They slowly try to gain the trust of the parents or caregivers and then take advantage of that trust. If they ever raise any suspicions, they alleviate the concerns by showing their exemplary actions.
- Eroding Boundaries Gradually: By gradually gaining the trust of both the parents and the child, the predator starts breaking down the child’s boundaries by increasing physical contact. They start with innocent touches such as rubbing their back, holding their hand, or caressing their hair. Soon, they pretend to touch or rub against their victim accidentally. They always tend to be near the child as much as possible. Soon, they move on to touching the child’s body inappropriately.
- Building A Secretive Relationship With The Child: Gradually, the perpetrator starts building up a secretive relationship. They instill fear in the child by saying that they will get discovered if they share anything with their parents. They try to alleviate any hesitation from the child by reassuring them their relationship is better than any other the child may have as it is memorable. They also reassure the child that touching each other is not wrong as they trust each other. Another way that the predator instills fear in the child and manipulate them is by telling them that they would face the consequences if they report their activities
- Securing Compliance From The Child: The predator tries to engage in increasingly inappropriate and immoral behaviors gradually. They manipulate their victim even more to urge them to engage in sexual acts. In case the child does not comply, they threaten that their loved ones might come to harm. Hence, a predator makes sure that the child does their bidding.
How to Teach Your Child To Defend Themselves Against Predators?
As a parent, you must start getting more involved in the child’s daily activities and ensuring that you know and trust all the adults that your child meets. For example, it would be best to make unannounced visits to your child’s daycare or coaching classes, etc. You must also teach your child how to identify grooming behaviors and talk to them in age-appropriate language to warm them against predators.
Conclusion
You should ensure that your child is not afraid to talk to you about anything. Your child must trust you not to give them penalties or criticize them if they express your feelings. It is sometimes difficult to get your child to trust you, but it is better to try now even though it’s tough and time-consuming. That way, you can ensure that your child is never in harm’s way.
